The Heavy Metal Matador (rydain) wrote,
The Heavy Metal Matador

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Things that chafe my ass - cat misconception edition

"Having had real experience, you can't tell a cat what to scratch on." Ooookay. So I suppose that Chester and Cookie, who do the vast majority of their scratching on sisal posts and mats and corrugated cardboard that we give them for that purpose, are some sort of VR sim, then? Wow, thanks for telling me. I thought they were real, what with the food consumption and the soft fur and the cuddles and the litterbox that needs to be cleaned periodically. Ain't technology grand? I'm sure all the folks in cats_with_claws and the cat forum regulars would love to know that their feline friends don't actually exist, too.

"I'm sure your cats would LOVE to go outside." (Note: in its original context, "go outside" = "roam freely".) Yeah, they'd just love to be turned into a grease spot on University Drive. Or maybe they'd love to die of kidney failure like one of my mom's cats, who got into some sort of nasty poison. They might also love to be tormented by a random fuckbucket who thinks it's OMFG SOOO MACHO to hurt defenseless animals. Considering that we have a total of around 2000 square feet of house for them to rampage around in and umpteen toys, perching spots, and hidey holes for their enjoyment and that they're about as far from fat and lazy as cats can get, I think they're pretty fricking happy with their lifestyle.
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