The Heavy Metal Matador (rydain) wrote,
The Heavy Metal Matador

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I still exist

Bah. Worked for 2 weeks straight, had one day off because I was sick. Stuff is done. I'm happy. I don't really have much else of interest to share with the world. I've been slowly working on my writing, practicing piano, still helping with that Warriors Orochi tier list which is going to take quite a while to finish. At least an expert is doing all the character videos, so I'm mainly helping with setup and strategies for random people and collecting information for the FAQ we'll eventually write.

For anyone who cares, he did Cao Ren's video already. A+++++ WIN. Go watch it if you're curious. He pwns me, but that's a good thing. I like learning from more skilled people.

Oh's something for the Dynasty and Samurai Warriors fans, borne out of a silly GameFAQs message board game. Context - I spun the Wheel of Destiny and wound up with all the guys of Warriors Orochi at my house. The cool ones got to stay and party, and they all took turns guarding the door to keep out the likes of Dong Zhuo and Yoshimoto Imagawa. I've been pondering a account just to post all my random stupidity.

Rock Band is in full swing.

Keiji Maeda, on drums: I love this game! Time to ROCK!
Masamune Date: Hey, where does the line start?
Cao Ren, on bass: You're in next time someone loses.
Musashi Miyamoto, on lead guitar: I don't know who's going to lose, but it won't be me.
Keiji, smacking Musashi with the drumsticks: Do you ever shut up? Chew on THIS!
Me: You break those, you owe me.

* * * * *

Cao Ren, in the red: But I know this one...
Musashi, at the top of the meter: And you said this was an easy song. Who's the best? Who's the best?
Cao Ren, bombing out: I can't see over Keiji's hair.
Gan Ning: I'm up next! Get outta the way!
Cao Ren: Fair enough - I suppose it is my turn to guard the door.

* * * * *

Zhang He: Who is in the mood for a fabulous makeover?
Ranmaru, trying unsuccessfully to hide: ...
Zhang He: I will bring some color to your cheeks!
Ranmaru: I am too manly for makeup.
Zhang He: That has never stopped me.

* * * * *

Magoichi Saika: Nice house. Why don't you give me a...personal tour of the bedroom.
Me, pointing at dolled-up Ranmaru: Why don't you go hit on her over there?

* * * * *

Zhuge Liang, Sima Yi, Lu Meng, and Lu Xun are playing chess as 2-man teams.

Lu Xun: You sunk my battleship!
Lu Meng: Do you even know what you're playing? That's the last time I share my beer with you, kid.

Zhuge Liang accidentally summons wind and knocks over half the board.

Sima Yi, zapping him with a laser beam: You just forfeited our turn, you fool!

* * * * *

Xu Zhu: I love parties! Where's the food?
Meng Huo: Gimme something to eat! I'm starving!
Goemon Ishikawa: Did somebody say food? Here I come!

Me: Who let these guys in?

As Dian Wei prevents the free food crew from demolishing my kitchen, I go to find out what happened to security.

Green-faced Cao Ren is twitching on the front lawn. Two steps later and the stench hits me - a stomach-heaving flatulence cloud so thick I can almost taste it. They must have tag-teamed poor Rockman with a triple fart musou.

Cao Ren, trying his best not to hurl: ...I have crumbled.

* * * * *

Dian Wei: Think of something quick! I don't know how long I can take three against one.

After some strategizing and bribing of key party guests...

Huang Gai: The fire pit is all ready.
Xu Huang: And here's the chopping block.
Zhang Fei: All set to butcher! Now who's in charge of the meat supply?

Pang Tong levitates, dropping a confused cow out of his robes.

Huang Gai: How'd you do that?
Pang Tong: Explanations aren't really my thing.

The smell of barbeque wafts into the house. The entire place shakes as Team Fat stampedes outside to salivate. I'd drool, too, if I liked meat. I really should have gone to the store before spinning the Wheel of Destiny. The other guys ate most of my food.

A plate of perfectly grilled fish appears in my hands. I know two people who could have done this, but I haven't seen either. Then again, that's to be expected.

Hanzo Hattori, from somewhere close by: served.

* * * * *

Musashi has been pwning for three hours straight.

Musashi: I am invincible!
Masamune: Nobody cares, you self-righteous ass!
Keiji, failing out: Got it handed to me on that one. Shorty! You're up!

Before taking over on drums, Cao Ren steals Musashi's Red Bull and replaces it with Kool-Aid. An hour later, the effects of caffeine deprivation set in.

Musashi: This controller must be dying...yeah...that's it. When's the last time you charged this thing?


Cao Ren: One more enemy outlasted!

* * * * *

Lu Xun: Connect Four! We win!
Lu Meng: ...sigh...
Sima Yi: I told you this game should have an age limit.

Thrilled with his apparent victory over the Fan Boys, Lu Xun wanders away from the chess game.

Lu Meng: Anyone care to help me finish this? Anyone?
Wei Yan: I...want...turn...
Lu Meng: Why can't possibly be any worse.

Zhuge Liang focuses for several minutes and makes a careful move.

Wei Yan: ...Foolish.

Wei Yan moves.

Wei Yan: Check...mate.
Sima Yi, unleashing more laser beams on Zhuge Liang: You allowed us to be beaten by that imbecile?
Wei Yan: Not...stupid. Speech...problem.
Tags: general bullshit
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